God, this stinks.

It hurts. It really really does.

And yet I've run out of energy to ask You 'why', cuz it's so cliched and it's useless. And I know better than to blame You. Yet somehow more than ever, You are close. I can hear You whisper and I can hear You speak--they way You used to joke and banter with me when I was a child.

People ask me, how can I hear You, how can I know it is really You? I dunno, I just do. And when I do, I don't ask anymore questions.

But oh God, it still hurts.