CONSPIRACY

Welcome to the 8.34pm Lame News Network. The top story today;

Melbourne University's media and politics lecturer thinks that we're all DOOMED to be doped by the LIES perpetuated by the elite who flirt with the media as a means to an end. Beware people, be afraid. Is our government REALLY doing things in our interest?

Today, on Lame's exceedingly-self-centred news, I bring you Dr. Boring Wanker with a case study of war coverage pertaining to Iraq, another thorn in the side for the Bush and Blair administration.

In 2003, someone leaked a few photos of 'British troops' in Iraq wearing uniforms, abusing two Iraqi teenagers, to The Spam tabloid newspaper known for it's anti-Blair stance. The editor decided to run the pictures. However, investigations were later carried out to gage it's authenticity. It was a very thorough investigation headed by Spot-the-Difference experts as it boiled down to micro aspects such as the insignia on the jackets and the what kind of buttons were on the shirts. It was found that the insignia and buttons in the photos were not the same as those in the regiment posted there at that time. So the photos were faked.

Ms. Busy Body, who wrote about the pictures, resigned in disgrace and other authentic stories and photos of abuse never really made it into the media again. The media was effectively silenced by fear.

"It was a brilliant piece of manipulation," said Dr. Wanker. "The Government KNEW beforehand that there will be potential stories on troops abusing civillians and therefore leaked fake pictures to the media, knowing experts will pick on it later and prove them fake."

Prime Minister Tony Blair was unavailable for comment.

This is Sarah Chew, reporting from Physiology Building, Tute Room 116. Lame News Network.